Shorthand
End over end standing still
It’s all you think about and all you will
So just pretend you understand
When the ink dries the well spills
I write in shorthand when I’m really on
The words punctuation for affection and harm,
I’ll say too much I’ll say everything wrong
The whole gets fucked up so I’ll just get lost.
And when this begins moving slow
I’ll suffocate the fire with the coal
I’ll drive too fast, I’ll lose control
When the breaks fail we’ll fly off the road
I’ll paint a picture that is far from the truth
In hopes these afflictions will spark something in you
Cuz my whole life I’ve done every wrong
And the people who stood by they just played along
I walked across a gate and a broken lock
Pushed it open and ignored the sign
And in the dark I climbed up the mountainside
Where at the top there were men wearing suits and ties
And in their thoughts they were building an empire
Of the fields and stalks that used to be mine
Where metal birds hung on a clothesline
Swung back and forth across the valley’s spine
And they said ‘Child, You could be the one
If you move this way we’ll get you back to numb’
I spent my days under their dirty thumbs
I worked nine to five then five to one
And their daughters always gave me a second glance
And their water tasted like wine
It left me thirsty and drunk off the romance
But no one heard me when I started to cry
I paid them off
With all the money in my hand
They said ‘It’ll take more then this to make you a rich man’
And they said ‘Child, You could be the one
If you move this way we’ll get you back to none’
I spent my days under their dirty sun
I worked nine to five then five to one
Spent my days under their dirty thumbs
I worked nine to five then five to one
Old friend, what have you done?
I worked nine to five then five to one
There’s a spot here you could see the clouds
Past the factories and abandon towns
It felt like freight trains moving people out
Though eventually you would learn to run
Just pack your things and you’d be gone
It’s a long walk home when the fight was never won
Cuz my whole life it was what I been running from
When we were young we would role the windows down
And drive around and scream and shout to cast the spirits out
It was impossible to fake
And at night we’d hear the strangest sounds
Through the streets and every broken house
Better keep the your voices down
Was it more than you could take?
Cuz my whole life I had been running
One day I will wake up and will be somebody else
And tell you all the things that I could never tell myself
Don’t wake me when it all caves in
I’ll be trapped inside
It’s how I learned to hide
And these days pretend that I am lost,
For words when all these words tie up my thoughts
And every time you call or you fall too far away
Let everything you said mean everything you say
On the street today a tender tone
As a man sang ‘New York’s is not my home’
It’s where at least I’ll never feel as alone
As I search myself for change
And I walked along 5th avenue,
Where I wondered if I’d every forget you,
When I’ve found myself
In someone new
One day I will wake up and will be somebody else
And tell you all the things that I could never tell myself
Don’t wake me when it all caves in
I’ll be trapped inside
You should know better then to write me
Every time you fall
Or call me when all my dead letters
Start to crawl
When everyone ends with the same familiar scrawl
I was sleeping in my bedroom
With the house on fire
You were floating to the window dressed in white
Saying everything’s fine
Even in my dreams you were misleading me all along
But I just play piano till the smoke filled my lungs
If you’re ready to fight I’ll take you down
If it’s the only way you’ll understand
That it’s obvious some things won’t mend
You would see it in my eyes if you could see me
But I never want to see you again
When you find some other lover
And you find your soul
Will you turn him into just another part of you
You can’t control
Disconnecting every phone from wire
Now every ghost will sleep silently tonight
If you’re ready to fight I’ll take you down
If it’s the only way you’ll understand
That it’s obvious some things won’t mend
You would see it in my eyes if you could see me
But I never want to see you again
This is the moment with the melody collapses
And the piano breaks its strings
It’s when the patrons turn their eyes into their glasses
And the lights come on and the whole thing ends
But it’s only you and me
And I am drunk and I want to leave
I am waiting for a train and when it passes
It’s a fare I can’t afford
Through it’s windows I see hundreds of romances
But you’re never at my door
I have been your love
And I have been your pain
And I have been someone other than myself to you
Over and over again
The is the part where all my thoughts start to surround me
And try to make something of fate
But it’s never clear whose side their on or why their here
Just that they only lead one place
To the room when it starts to spin
And I forget everything said
Where the part of me that sways
Says I’m drunk and I want to stay
I have been your love
And I have been your pain
I have been the broken glass in your window
That soaks your bed with rain
And I don’t know if I’d been what you wanted
Or what you wanted me to change
Just I have been someone other than myself to you
Over and over again
On the day you were born
There were birds in the sky,
They were carrying whispers
That you speak in the night
And I heard them in secret
As you sang in your room
Still heart breaking wishes
As you carried a tune
Cuz lady you have the softest expanse in your smile
On the day that you marry
The music will be
Inaudible rhythms
In circadian beat
And the sun will find shelter
In the light of your way
And the wind will forever
Breathe the words that you say
Cuz lady you have the softest expanse in your style
And on the day you discover
That all is a dream
The world will recover
And will finally be free
And we’ll all live forever
In the beauty of peace
A kiss from a lover
Can change everything
Cuz lady you have the softest expanse in your smile
Hold my secrets tenderly and I will build your home
Sow your fingers to my sleeve and I won’t let you go
I was wrong, you believed me all along
I was lost, and you swayed my darkest thoughts
I wasted my love
I lost in a fight
You turned my burses white
I poured out my bones
You stuffed them back in
Until I could stand again
I was wrong, you believed me all along
I was lost, and you swayed my darkest thoughts
The hollow echoing in me you filled with song
Until it became an endless sea that you walked upon
I had died, while at sea
It was dark as day when it hit the street
I’m gonna wake up and I’m gonna show up in a suit and tie
And I’m gonna shake your hand governor, cuz I ain’t afraid to die
I’m gonna blow up and I’m gonna grow up a hundred miles high
And I’m gonna shake your hand dear sir, cuz I ain’t afraid to die
Half man army is in the street
A thousand half men army
I’m gonna come back and I’m gonna take back what you took from me
I’m gonna shake your hand governor for what you’ve done to me
Half man army is in the street
Two thousand half men army
Nothing can stop me, you know you can’t stop me not politics or pride
I’m gonna shake your hand Mr., cuz I ain’t afraid to die
I’m gonna come back and I’m gonna take back what you took from me
I’m gonna break your hands dear sir, for you’ve done to me
Half man army is in the street
Ten thousand half men army
Miss is on the phone with some man
Mister’s on a barstool with other plans
Where someone’s hips are touching someone’s hands
Cuz it’s so easy when you’re so amusing
It’s a sure thing when you’re so unassuming
Cuz lies are easy enough to recognize if you must
I told you straight truth
That I’d be no good for you
And four hours spent trying
It’ll take ‘til morning ‘til I show you why
Cuz you don’t even know whose heart you’re stealing
In a wave of failed relationships and discrete dealings
Is it easy enough for you to hang on?
Cuz I’ve been living without hope for so long
That I’d believe about anyone who would prove me wrong
So take me back to where I don’t belong
How many of these lost lies have I to make?
For something other than an undercover mistake
I told you straight truth
That I’d be no good for you
And three hours spent trying
It’ll take ‘til morning ‘til I show you why
I told you straight truth
That I’d be no good to you
And two hours spent trying
It’ll take ‘til morning ‘til I show you why
Miss is on the phone with some man
Mister’s on a barstool with other plans
Back in our old house on sand
Where the planes take off then they land
I dreamt we were floating in a pale blue sky
Where you’d wake me up and say
I heard you sleep talking again
But all of your whispers keep me up all night
Said ‘I was blind, still I showed you the light’
But then you left me in the dark
Early in the morning when the sun splits the street
It crawls through your window and paints lines on your check
But you don’t wake up just go back to sleep
Until it leaves you in the dark
Can’t you hear it, the softest tone?
It tells you that you are never alone
But you won’t let it call you home
